By the
late George Carlin's Views On Ageing
Do you realize that the
only time in our lives when we like to get old is when we're kids?
If you're less than 10 years old, you're so excited about aging that
you think in fractions.
"How old are you?" "I'm
four and a half!"
You're never thirty-six and a half. You're four and a half, going on five!
That's the key.
You get into your teens,
now they can't hold you back.
You jump to the next number ... or even a few ahead.
"How old are you?" "I'm gonna be 16!"
You could be 13, but hey, you're gonna be 16!
And then the greatest day
of your life
you
become 21.
Even the words sound like
a ceremony
.
. .
YOU BECOME 21.
YESSSS!!!
But then you turn 30.
Oooohh what
happened there?
Makes you sound like bad milk.
He TURNED;
we had to throw him out.
There's no fun now.
You're just a sour-dumping.
What's
wrong?
What's changed?
You BECOME
21,
you TURN 30,
then you're
PUSHING
40.
Whoa!
Put on the brakes .. it's
all slipping away.
Before you know it, you REACH 50
and your dreams are gone.
But
wait!!!
You MAKE IT
to 60.
You didn't think you would!
So
you BECOME
21, TURN 30,
PUSH
40,
REACH
50 and
MAKE IT
to
60.
You've built up so much speed that you
HIT 70!
After that it's a day-by-day thing; you HIT
Wednesday!
You get into your 80s and
every day is a complete cycle;
you HIT
lunch; you TURN
4:30;
you REACH bedtime.
And it doesn't end there
.
Into the 90s, you start going backwards ...
"I Was JUST 92."
Then a strange thing happens.
If you make it over 100, you become a little kid again.
"I'm
100 and
a half!"
May you all make it to a
healthy 100 and a half!!
.HOW
TO STAY YOUNG
1. Throw
out nonessential numbers.
This includes age, weight
and height.
Let the doctors worry about them.
That is why you pay "them!"
2. Keep only cheerful
friends.
The
grouches pull you down.
3. Keep
learning.
Learn more about the computer,
crafts, gardening, whatever. Never let the brain idle.
"An idle mind is
the devil's workshop."
And
the devil's name is Alzheimer's.
.
4. Enjoy
the simple things.
.5. Laugh
often ... long and loud.
Laugh until you gasp for
breath.
.
6. The
tears happen.
Endure, grieve, and move
on.
The only person who is with us our entire life, is ourselves.
Be ALIVE while you are alive.
.
7. Surround yourself with
what you love ..
whether
it's .. family, pets, keepsakes,
music, plants, hobbies, whatever.
Your home is your refuge.
.
8. Cherish
your health.
If it is good, preserve
it.
If it is unstable, improve it.
If it is beyond what you can improve, get help.
.
9. Don't
take guilt trips.
Take a trip to the mall ... even to the next county .
to a foreign country, but NOT to where the guilt is.
10. Tell the people you
love
that you love them.
at every opportunity.
AND ALWAYS REMEMBER:
Life is not measured
by the number of breaths we take, but by the moments that take our breath away.
And if you don't
forward this to other people ..
Who Cares?